Rivals

 

Recently, my husband and I took a trip with my parents and my friend to go to the PAC-12 Men's Basketball Tournament in Las Vegas. Both my husband and I graduated from the University of Arizona, and we're all big Wildcat fans. 

The very first night, the couple on right in the picture above came and sat next to us wearing gear for our arch rivals - the Arizona State Sun Devils. All of us inwardly groaned thinking about four straight days of basketball sitting side by side with our 'enemy'. But we couldn't have been more wrong!

We found out that they're a house divided with her rooting for ASU and him rooting for the U of A. We were shocked that they could make such an arrangement work. They both cheer for the other's team until they play each other - then it's every man/woman for themselves. 

Our teams did end up playing against each other during the tournament. I always try to be a considerate fan to those around me, knowing how much I hate when others are mean-spirited to opposing fans, but getting to know them made me be extra careful about how I cheered on my team. Both of us have bad stories of the other team's fans being rude, and it was so refreshing to be able to sit side by side in companionship even during an intense rivalry game. 

They come to the tournament every year, and shared their knowledge with us. Before the championship game, she told us that they sell the shirts that they give the winning team right after the game, but if you don't get down there quickly, they sell out. She then offered to go down with two minutes left in the game if it looked like the Wildcats would win and get the shirts for all of us, so that we could enjoy the celebration afterwards. True to her word, even though the game was a close one, she left with two minutes left to be first in line and watched the rest of the game on the televisions in the walkways. Because she didn't have a strong allegiance to either team in the championship game, it wasn't a big deal for her to miss out on the last couple minutes, but it meant the world to us. In the picture above, we're all wearing the shirts that she graciously got for us.

After the arena emptied, we walked through crowds of celebrating Wildcat fans. Everywhere we went we got asked where we got our shirts. We felt like celebrities and joked that we were going to make the story of how we got our shirts our 'fish' story that grew to exponential proportions every time we told it. 

Rivalries in sports can be heated, but it can also be an area where friendships grow - and can be a way to show the love of God to others. It made me think of how we often create rivalries where none need to exist. We compare ourselves to that other mom who seems to have it all together and they become our rival. Or we compare our ministry to somebody else's and feel like they get more accolades for their service. In our jobs, we can definitely feel competitive with others as they get promoted or recognized. For me, it would be easy to see writers that I met at a conference get publishing contracts, and feel some jealousy. 

It doesn't need to be this way though. God puts us where we are, gifts us in the way He determines, and has a plan for each of us that is unlike anybody else. Our new friends showed me that rivals can be respectful and friendly while working together to accomplish a goal. If it works this well in something as simple as being kind spectators at a sporting event, how much more could it work if we practiced it in everyday life?

Hop into Spring Giveaway

 

Hello Readers!

Are you gearing up for spring? I am, and I'm excited to feel the warmer weather! With that in mind, I have partnered with Celebrate Lit for a giveaway just for you to build up that spring TBR pile!

Here's your chance to win 40 books or a $500 Amazon card to buy a ton of books for yourself in Celebrate Lit's Hop into Spring Giveaway.

Click here to enter: https://promosimple.com/ps/2430f/2023-hop-into-spring

The giveaway is going on now through March 18.

Writing Tools

 I'm so thankful to be writing in an era that has so much information at my fingertips. We all know the power of a good internet search for authors. I've looked up things like average temperatures in certain locations, checked to make sure my fictional town is indeed fictional, and found out symptoms for diseases. In my current work in progress, I've had to look up information about a specific surgery and the recovery time. It is incredibly helpful! I can't imagine trying to write before the internet and having to leave home to do research - exhausting!

There are a couple of other tools besides generic internet searches that I use frequently that people might not consider. The first is behindthename.com/random. Sometimes naming characters is easy, but sometimes it's more difficult. This website allows me to set some parameters and then randomly generates names from which to choose. If I want some specific ethnic names, I can select that and get a list (including surnames) that I can use for my characters. I used this in Maui Christmas because I wanted traditional Hawaiian names that were also not super common. For minor characters, I might use it if nothing is coming to mind for the name. Plus, it's a lot of fun - at least for a nerd like me who loves names.

Another tool that I've only recently begun to use is houseplans.net. I can't always picture a floor plan in my mind. It's very vague to me which makes it difficult to write. I discovered this tool when working on A Groom for Christmas so that I could find a little mountain cabin for Bryce's grandma. Since then, I use it often. I can select regional areas and styles of homes, and then select the one that I think fits best. It's fantastic! (If you want to see the floor plan I'm using in my upcoming Holliday Hotel book, you can click here) 

Not only are these sites useful, they're also fun to play around in. I can waste a lot of time looking up names or houses. Do you know of any other tools that writers use? I'd love to hear about them if you do! 

Technology is a blessing for research. It makes writing much easier, and kind of fun, too.

Photo by Nao Triponez: https://www.pexels.com/photo/shallow-focus-photography-of-macbook-792199/

We Love Our Readers Giveaway

 Happy February Readers!

February is the month we celebrate love. As an author, I am so thankful for all your love and support! I wanted to show you how much I love all my readers by partnering up with Celebrate Lit Publicity for their We Love Our Readers Multi-Author Giveaway.

Here is your chance to win 45 books or a $500 Amazon card to buy a ton of books for yourself in Celebrate Lit's We Love Our Readers Giveaway.

Click here to enter: https://promosimple.com/ps/23a85/2023-we-love-our-readers

The event and giveaway is going on now through February 19.

Love & Thanks

Recently I read an article that said scientists had done a study and discovered that successful couples say one phrase more often than other couples. While I thought it might be words of encouragement or a simple "I love you", the answer was more simple. They said thank you. It's more than just a casual 'thanks' though. It's about being specific with your gratitude. So saying something like, "Thanks for making dinner tonight. I was really wiped out after such a long day, and it was nice to have dinner ready by the time I got home." Not only does it focus the attention on the good things in the relationship, it's also contagious. It doesn't take long for it to become something that both partners do.

Since the next book in the Holliday Hotel series is the Thanksgiving book, I found this very interesting. Obviously giving thanks and gratitude would have to be a feature in the book, that's a given, but maybe it needs to be a key component, not only of the situations in the plot, but of the relationship between the characters as well. Is it possible that being grateful not only keeps the relationship strong, but can it help someone fall in love in the first place? 

What if one of them felt continually unappreciated and struggled with their own value? Then having someone who noticed the things that they did and thanked them for it could get them to take notice of that person. Or maybe a character has only had superficial relationships based on shallow things that can change like looks or wealth. When someone appreciates them for what they do and who they are, they finally feel like someone knows them at a deeper level like they've always wanted. There are lots of ways to incorporate thankfulness into a romance.

It makes sense. When I think about the times I'm most upset with my husband, it's because I'm focusing on myself and all the things that are wrong instead of being grateful for all the things that he does for me and all the blessings that we have together. I truly believe that God had a plan for our relationship and designed for us to be together, so shouldn't I spend more time being grateful? 

How can we shift the focus? The article suggested studying your spouse, following them around and taking notes of what they do. Personally, I wouldn't enjoy being treated like a science experiment, and I doubt my husband would either (he'd find ways to turn it into a joke). I think a better option would be to try to find one thing a day to thank your spouse for, something specific, and something that shows that you truly see them. Once that habit begins to take shape, I think that gratitude will start to become second nature. 

In real life, I think this goes beyond a marriage relationship. How much nicer would our work place be if we genuinely and specifically thanked people? How might our kids respond when we thank them earnestly for the ways they help out? Would our friendships grow deeper if we showed gratitude for what they do and their support? It's something that requires so little effort, and yet can make a huge impact on others.

Love and thankfulness go hand-in-hand. One helps the other to grow. Let's be a people who appreciate others and tell them about it!

Photo by Marcus Wöckel: https://www.pexels.com/photo/silver-colored-heart-lock-bridge-883466/

New Years Giveaway

 

Happy New Years Readers!

To kick off 2023 I wanted to do something special to get your year started so I have teamed up with Celebrate Lit to do a huge giveaway just for you!

Here is your chance to win over 45 books or a $500 Amazon card to buy a ton of books for yourself in Celebrate Lit's Happy New Year Readers Giveaway.

Click here to enter:

https://promosimple.com/ps/24309/2023-happy-new-year-readers-updated

The event and giveaway is going on now through January 15.

Forced to Rest

At the beginning of November, I had a passing thought. I hadn't been sick since January. I'll admit that I felt pretty proud at that moment. Sickness and I don't have a great relationship. I'm the type of person that fills my calendar and is on the go most of the time. Sickness slows me down, and it's never a good time to be sick because there's always something going on. I'm too busy to take time off.

But sometimes there isn't really a choice, and I'm forced to rest. About a week after I had the thought of the last time that I had been sick, I got laryngitis. I felt fine, but I had no voice. As a teacher, that's a problem. So I took three days off to recover. They were the best sick days I've ever had, because I felt fine and had energy so I was still able to get things done, but I really couldn't teach. I still went in to work after school and graded papers since I had to go to pick up my daughter anyway. It wasn't so bad. I was sick, but felt pretty good and didn't get too far behind. 

About a week and a half later, I came home from school with a scratchy throat and a cough. I had felt fine that morning, but this virus came on quickly. By that evening I had a fever of 102, chills, and aches. Two more days off of work and a weekend of rest allowed me to recover. This illness was not as productive as the first since this time I felt terrible. Another forced rest at a busy time of year. 

With two illness under my belt, I was already regretting my thought at the beginning of November, and beginning to feel like I had jinxed myself. I'm not normally superstitious, but this might be an exception. 

During final week of school before Christmas break, I woke up at four in the morning with stomach pain. I didn't want to admit that I would need to call in yet again, but as the hours passed and the pain remained, I knew that I would not be able to teach that day either. My husband took the kids to school, and while he was gone I text to ask him if he would take me to the emergency room when he got back. Knowing that I'm not one to admit that I'm sick or need help, he dropped our daughter off early and came back to take me to the emergency center near our house. 

The emergency center was amazing! They got me into a room before I had done much more than put my name on the paperwork. The doctor saw me soon after and let me know what tests they were going to run. He hadn't been gone long before they got me for the CT scan. The results were back soon revealing that I had appendicitis. Another forced rest, and this time it was going to be longer than a couple of days.

By 3:15 pm, I was in the operating room. It was startling how quickly everything went, and it testified to how urgent my situation was. Doctors and nurses seemed surprised that I had only started feeling pain that morning, so I figure my appendix was in pretty rough shape. I was in enough pain by this point, that I was happy to be getting surgery.

It's now been two weeks since my surgery. I've found that I'm a very impatient patient. Since the surgery was laparoscopic, I had placed unrealistic expectations on my recovery. I expected to be sore for a couple days, and then be feeling almost back to normal. For a week and half I barely moved from my spot on the couch because it was the only place I felt comfortable. Sleeping was difficult because every position hurt. Finally, I turned a corner, and felt more tender than sore. I praise God for the timing of that, because the first day that I wasn't in a lot of pain was the day before Christmas Eve. This allowed me to attend our Christmas Eve service at church and go to all the family activities planned through Christmas weekend. 

It's not surprising that I often push myself too hard and end up feeling a little tender as a result, but the doctor was pleased with my progress yesterday. I'm still in stretchy pants because jeans are not comfortable, and I still have to take it easy or I'll regret it later. I still have another 2 weeks of lifting restrictions as well. 

This was not how I envisioned my November and December going. I didn't want to spend most of my Christmas break in pain on the couch. Still there have been some benefits to this forced rest. I've had some nice evenings of relaxation with my family. I've had some extra time to write. My husband has taken very good care of me, and it's been nice to be spoiled a little bit, nice to be cared for instead of caring for everyone else for a little while.

There's a saying that if we don't schedule time to rest, our bodies will choose a time to rest for us. I run my life too busy, too stressed, with too little sleep, and my body forced me to rest - again and again and again. I need to be better about making time to rest, choosing to say no, and taking care of me. 

I'm not one to make resolutions for the new year, but I do believe in being aware of where I need to change and grow. This is something I need to work on as I enter 2023. I need to plan more time of rest, get better sleep, and take better care of me. 

 Photo by Pixabay: https://www.pexels.com/photo/blur-close-up-coffee-coffee-cup-236699/